The Running Blues

I haven't gone for a run in about a month. I haven't done much of anything this past month. It's discouraging to be doing so well only to hit the fatigue road block again and again and again. There are moments when I'm pretty down on myself, but thankfully I'm having more and more days when I can think positively about my situation, which is a big deal! This is a process and, as with most things, there will be successes and failures along the way. There are things I long for, like having a body that can physically handle the plans of my heart, or a mind that can rest without worry and fear, for the cloud of depression that threatens to take over to be gone forever, to be able to drive again. I long for these things, and will continue working and praying for a positive outcome, but I realize that we don't always get what we want in this life. I'm having to undo old thinking patterns, and deal with the frustration that comes along with the realization that being a follower of Christ is not a guarantee for my life running smoothly all the time. I'm really starting to take hold of the promise that one day God will set all things right, and that I can have peace even if those things are not set right during my time on this earth. So, today I couldn't go for a run, or get the house cleaned, or drive my car, but I managed to have moments of thankfulness and peace and for that I rejoice!